The service industry teaches skills that extend far beyond taking orders, and many of them look a lot like therapy skills in disguise.
The belief that everyone should work in the service industry at least once in their life is a popular one, and for good reason. Restaurant work teaches lessons that extend far beyond taking orders or carrying trays of food. It builds life skills, strengthens communication, and helps people work through conflict.
Maybe I'm a little biased. I grew up working in my family's restaurants and continue to do so today. Therefore, many of the lessons I learned there have shaped not only who I am as a person but what I want to do with my future. Now, as someone who wants to enter the mental health field, I've started to notice how many of those same skills are connected to mental health.
Here are some lessons that stand out to me.
Communication matters
Restaurants are extremely fast moving. In five minutes a server can get triple sat, an order can get misinterpreted, a customer can become upset, a drink can spill, and food can get overcooked. Therefore clear communication is necessary for a smooth and successful shift. Whether you're taking an order, coordinating with the kitchen, assisting a frustrated customer, or helping another server, learning to communicate effectively is essential. I would say 99% of the mistakes or problems I see in the restaurant stem from miscommunication. Therefore, asking those extra questions, listening closely to a customer's order, and paying attention to any menu changes or "86ed" items all help build my communication skills.
Outside of restaurant work, communication is equally as important. Having the ability to express our thoughts, listen closely, and respond appropriately strengthens our relationships and lessens our stress.
Teamwork makes the dream work
No restaurant succeeds or fails because of one person. Servers, cooks, hosts, bartenders, managers, bussers, and dishwashers all rely on one another in order to be successful. Learning when to pitch in when someone is "in the weeds" or how to ask for help when you need it is a necessary skill that can be learned through the camaraderie of working in a restaurant.
Similarly, mental health isn't something we have to manage entirely on our own, either. Having a support system of family and friends is incredibly important when it comes to overcoming mental health issues. While it may be intimidating or humbling to ask others for help, it is ultimately necessary in order to make positive changes.
Conflict resolution is a skill
If you've ever worked in a restaurant, you know that conflict is unavoidable. Orders get mixed up, customers get frustrated, coworkers butt heads, and people make mistakes. This experience can be difficult to navigate at first; however, you eventually learn how to stay calm, communicate respectfully, and focus on finding solutions.
Those same skills are valuable in everyday life. Conflict is a part of life, and people need to learn how to handle it. As someone who used to avoid conflict like the plague, dealing with conflict at work has allowed me to be more comfortable with it when it arises elsewhere. Furthermore, it has shown me that conflict doesn't always have to be negative. When approached with respect and understanding, conflict can strengthen relationships instead of hurt them.
Empathy is key
One of the biggest lessons restaurant work has taught me is that people can be dealing with something you can't see. The rude customer may be having family problems. The distracted coworker who keeps making mistakes may be dealing with a health issue. Therefore, it is important to approach every situation with as much empathy as possible.
While taking classes in psychology and counseling, I've been reminded just how important empathy is. Furthermore, spending time interning at Navesink Psych has only reinforced this idea. Taking a moment to consider another person's perspective can help us respond with greater compassion, ultimately leading to the best outcome for both the patient and clinician.
Final thoughts
Working in restaurants has taught me more life skills than just customer service. It has taught me how to communicate, work together, problem solve, and practice empathy, skills that are just as valuable for mental health as they are in the workplace.
As I continue learning in the field of psychology, I've come to appreciate how these everyday experiences can shape the way we relate to ourselves and others. These experiences have taught me that the most meaningful lessons about mental health begin in places we least expect, even at a busy seafood restaurant.
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Whether the lessons come from a restaurant, a classroom, or somewhere else entirely, our team at Navesink Psychological Services is here to help you build the communication and coping skills that support real mental health.
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