Why Simple Strategies Can Work Best

I was watching the Japan match with my kids when a coach grabbed a whiteboard and stopped me cold. It took me a few minutes to realize how brilliant it really was.


I was sitting at home watching the Japan vs. Netherlands match with my kids when I noticed something odd on the sideline. Japan's coach, Hajime Moriyasu, was holding up a whiteboard. My first reaction was confusion. What is he doing? And then: why would a coach use a whiteboard to show the time when there are screens everywhere and the entire stadium is a wall of technology?

It took me a few minutes to really get it. And when I did, I thought: that is genuinely brilliant.

Group F · June 14, 2026 · Dallas Stadium
Netherlands 2 – 2 Japan
Goals: Van Dijk 50', Nakamura 57', Summerville 64', Kamada 89'

Japan were down 2-1 with the clock running out. Moriyasu walked to the sideline and held up large handwritten numbers counting down the minutes remaining. No shouting. No tablet. No headset. Just numbers on a board, unmissable to every player on the pitch. And in the 89th minute, Daichi Kamada deflected home an equalizer. Japan finished 2-2 against one of the tournament favorites.

In a stadium roaring with 70,000 fans, a whiteboard said everything that needed to be said without a single word being spoken.

Why it worked

Here is what clicked for me. A roaring stadium swallows sound. Verbal instructions from the sideline, shouted across 60 yards of pitch, get lost before they arrive. But a visual prompt held up at eye level? Every player sees it instantly, including the wide attackers who are furthest from the bench. No ambiguity. No miscommunication. Just: this is how much time you have left, now go.

Zlatan Ibrahimovic put it well:

"I've seen a lot in football, big clubs, big egos, big money, but what Hajime Moriyasu did against the Netherlands? That's genius. Pure leadership. While the big European teams are busy with their fancy tablets and shouting into the noise, this man pulls out a simple whiteboard with giant handwritten numbers and outsmarts everyone. Respect."
Zlatan Ibrahimovic, June 2026

I also suspect this was not a spontaneous idea. Moriyasu was spotted using the same technique at halftime too. This was a rehearsed system, which is exactly why it worked so cleanly under that level of pressure. You cannot pull something out for the first time in the 89th minute of a World Cup match and expect it to land. The team already knew what it meant.

My desk is covered in Post-its

The moment I understood what Moriyasu was doing, I thought of my own desk. Right now there is a Post-it for people I need to call back, one for blog ideas I want to write, and one for things I need to follow up on at home. Writing them down means I can focus on the task in front of me without carrying the mental weight of trying not to forget everything else. The note holds it so my brain does not have to.

I recommend the same thing to clients constantly, especially those dealing with ADHD or executive functioning challenges. A small whiteboard on the fridge: what food needs to be bought, what is already there so you can figure out what to make. One by the front door: what you need to take when you leave. Sometimes one in the bathroom: the morning routine in order, shower, dry off, brush teeth, comb hair, get dressed. Not because people cannot figure those things out, but because when you are dysregulated, tired, or distracted, a visible prompt is the difference between getting it done and spending 20 minutes trying to remember what comes next.

In a stadium of 70,000 screaming fans, with a World Cup on the line, Moriyasu's players were essentially dysregulated. Adrenaline, pressure, fatigue. The whiteboard cut through all of it the same way a Post-it on the bathroom mirror cuts through a chaotic Monday morning.

The most effective tool is not always the most sophisticated one. It is the one that gets through when everything else is competing for your attention.

How to put this to work

  • 1
    Whiteboard on the fridge
    Two columns: what you need to buy, and what you already have. It takes 30 seconds to update and saves the daily "what's for dinner?" spiral. Visible, simple, always there.
  • 2
    Note by the front door
    Whatever needs to leave the house with you goes here the night before. Keys, permission slip, lunch, medication. You see it on the way out. Nothing gets left behind.
  • 3
    Morning routine in the bathroom
    For kids and adults alike, a simple ordered list on the mirror removes the need to remember what comes next. This is especially helpful for anyone with ADHD or executive functioning challenges who gets stuck mid-routine and loses track.
  • 4
    The two-pronged backup
    Worried about losing a Post-it? Write it, then photograph it on your phone. You get the analog visibility of the physical note and the digital safety net of the photo. Both serve a purpose at different moments in the day.

Frequently asked questions

Why do visual cues work better than verbal reminders for people with ADHD?
People with ADHD often have difficulty with working memory, which means verbal instructions can fade before they are acted on. Visual cues stay in the environment and continue to prompt without requiring the person to hold information in their head. They reduce reliance on memory and make the desired behavior more immediately accessible.
Is there a psychological reason why simplicity is more effective under pressure?
Yes. Under stress and high arousal, cognitive bandwidth narrows. Complex instructions that work fine in a calm environment become much harder to process when the pressure is on. Simple, clear cues cut through because they demand less processing. This is why rehearsed, minimalist systems tend to hold up in high-stakes moments better than elaborate ones.
How can I help my child use visual strategies at school?
Start small and involve your child in creating the system. A visual schedule on their desk, a checklist on the inside of their locker, or a simple color-coded planner can make a significant difference. The key is consistency and keeping the cues visible and meaningful to the child rather than overwhelming them with too much information at once.
When should I consider a formal evaluation for executive functioning challenges?
If you or your child are consistently struggling with organization, time management, task initiation, or follow-through in ways that are affecting daily life, school, or work, a comprehensive evaluation can identify the underlying profile and guide more targeted strategies. Simple visual tools are a great starting point, but they work best when the full picture is understood.

I was genuinely elated watching Japan pull off that late equalizer. And I was even more elated watching a whiteboard help make it happen. It was a good reminder that the simplest tools are often the most powerful, on the pitch and off it.

If you or your child are struggling with organization, executive functioning, or ADHD and want support building strategies that actually work in real life, our team is here.

Reach out for a free consultation

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Parenting in the Age of Ebikes: How to Navigate Tough Conversations

What parents need to know, and how to say it.


Our community has experienced real tragedy recently involving e-bikes. If you have a kid asking for an e-bike or permission to ride a friend's, this post is for you. Our goal is to equip parents with the knowledge and skills they need to feel ready to effectively talk to their teen and keep them safe.

This post comes from a place of deep personal experience. I was hit by a car while riding a regular bicycle as a young adult. I was lucky. The outcome could have been very different. And I was a college-aged adult with a developed brain and years of experience navigating the world and driving. I still ended up in the wrong place at the wrong time. That is the nature of road accidents. They can happen to anyone. But they are significantly more likely to happen to people who feel invincible and whose brains are not yet wired for the kind of situational awareness that sharing a road with cars requires.

That is not a criticism of teenagers. It is neuroscience.

The teen brain is not built for this

The prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for impulse control, risk assessment, and decision-making, does not fully develop until the mid-twenties, and develops later in males. Teenagers are not making bad decisions because they are bad kids. They are making bad decisions because the part of the brain that pumps the brakes on bad decisions is still under construction.

But it is not just the prefrontal cortex. Three interconnected areas of the brain all play a role in the kind of situational awareness that riding an e-bike on a road with cars actually requires.

Prefrontal Cortex
Handles impulse control, risk assessment, and decision-making. Still developing until the mid-twenties. This is the brake pedal, and in teenagers it is not fully installed.
Limbic System
Processes excitement and reward. In teenagers, this system is hyperactive and underconnected to the prefrontal cortex. The thrill of speed registers loudly. The rational warning signal stays quiet.
Anterior Cingulate Cortex
Responsible for real-time error detection and course correction. Underdeveloped in teens, meaning they are neurologically slower to recognize when a situation is going wrong and react in time.

E-bikes add a layer of danger that regular bicycles simply do not have. They are faster, heavier, and capable of reaching speeds that require real road experience to navigate safely. Most teenagers have never driven a car, and if they have it has not been for long. They have no frame of reference for how vehicles behave, how intersections work, or how fast things can go wrong. Throwing them onto a machine that can hit 28 miles per hour or more on a road with cars is not the same as letting them ride a bike around the neighborhood.

And then there are the modified bikes. Many of the e-bikes being sold and traded among teenagers have been altered to go significantly faster than their original design. Parents often do not know this is happening. The bike looks the same. It is not. Finding a reputable bike shop that can show you the differences and help your teen pick a bike that is the right fit is a great way to find a middle ground for teens who want an e-bike and parents who want to keep them safe. It also follows the harm reduction approach we will talk about next.

The thrill of speed is neurologically louder in the teenage brain than the warning signal that says slow down. That is not a character flaw. It is biology. And it is why the conversation has to start with parents, before the moment of decision arrives.

Abstinence does not work

I want to be honest with parents here, because I think the instinct to say "absolutely not, end of conversation" is understandable but not always effective. We know from research on teen substance use, sexual behavior, and risk-taking that a pure abstinence approach tends to fail. Teens find ways around it. The goal is not to pretend the risk does not exist. The goal is harm reduction.

That means: if your teenager is going to be around e-bikes, which they will be because their friends have them, the conversation cannot end at no. It has to include what to do when a friend offers them a ride, what to do if they feel pressured, and what safety looks like if they are ever on one.

  • 1
    If you do allow an e-bike
    Do not allow one that can be modified. Know exactly what your child has. Use location tracking apps like Life360, which can show you real-time speed not just location. Set clear expectations about speed limits, which roads are off-limits, and helmet use, with real consequences for violations and real rewards for consistent safe behavior.
  • 2
    If you do not allow an e-bike
    Make sure your teenager knows how to handle the moment a friend hands them a helmet and says get on. That conversation needs to happen before the moment, not after. Give them a script, not just a rule.
  • 3
    Find the middle ground with a reputable bike shop
    A knowledgeable shop can help you and your teen understand the difference between a safe, age-appropriate e-bike and the kind that gets modified and traded among teens at dangerous speeds. Involving your teen in that choice gives them ownership and you confidence in what they are riding.

How to talk to your teen about peer pressure around e-bikes

This is where the clinical piece comes in. We see this pattern constantly with alcohol, nicotine, and substance use. The same dynamics apply here.

Teenagers are not usually pressured by strangers. They are pressured by friends they like and want to stay connected to. Saying no in that moment feels like saying no to the friendship, which is why a flat refusal rarely works without a way out.

Give your teenager an exit. Something they can say that does not make them the problem.

"My parents track my location and they will see the speed."
"My parents will literally take my phone if I get on that."

Let the parent be the villain. That is fine. We can take it.

Let's not be naive: teens are much more tech savvy than parents and will always find a way to work around a system. Tracking is just one tool in the toolbox, but just like sometimes you need a hammer and sometimes you need a wrench, we always want to stock the toolbox with the right tools for the job. Besides tracking, regular conversations about the dangers of riding too fast can go a long way. Try not to preach. Instead, take an approach where you ask more questions than you provide facts. Keep the conversation open and ongoing. How to Talk So Teens Will Listen and Listen So Teens Will Talk is a timeless classic with practical advice for parents about how to have your voice actually heard.

The goal is to give your teenager a script that preserves the friendship and gets them off the bike.

When they say you're being overprotective

They will say it. Here is how I respond, and you are welcome to use it:

"When you were a baby, you did not want to get in your car seat either. You screamed about it. I strapped you in anyway because my job is to keep you safe, not to be your friend in every moment. That does not stop being true because you are older. It just looks different."

Overprotective is what teenagers call it when a parent does their job and the teenager does not like the outcome. That is okay. They do not have to like it. It is your job to keep them safe.

A note on New Jersey law

As of July 19, 2026, New Jersey has some of the strictest e-bike laws in the country. This is worth knowing not just for safety reasons but because it gives you a concrete, factual basis for the conversation with your teen that is harder to push back on than "I just think it's dangerous."

NJ E-Bike Law: effective July 19, 2026
Riders under 15 are banned from operating any e-bike on public roads
Riders 15 and 16 need a specialized motorized bicycle license from the NJ MVC, including a knowledge test, vision test, road test, and 45-day permit period
Riders 17 and older need a standard NJ driver's license
All e-bikes must be registered with the MVC and carry liability insurance
Helmets are mandatory for all riders at all ages

If your teenager is riding without a license, registration, and insurance, they are breaking the law. If something happens, your family may have no coverage. At best, something could happen to your child. At worst, others could be seriously hurt too.

Frequently asked questions

My teen says all their friends have e-bikes. How do I hold the line?
This is one of the most common pressure points parents face. The answer is not to dismiss the social reality but to acknowledge it while holding firm on the safety concern. "I know it feels like everyone has one. My job is not to be like everyone's parents. My job is to keep you safe." If you are open to allowing an e-bike under the right conditions, make that clear and work toward it together rather than making it a complete standoff.
How do I know if an e-bike has been modified?
This is genuinely hard to detect without expertise, which is exactly why we recommend involving a reputable bike shop. A knowledgeable shop can inspect a bike and identify whether it has been altered. If your teen is riding a bike that came from another teen, a private sale, or an online marketplace, it is worth having it looked at. Do not assume it is what it appears to be.
What if my teen rides an e-bike at a friend's house without my knowledge?
This is where the pre-conversation matters most. If your teen already has a script, an exit line they can use with friends, they are far more likely to use it in the moment. It is also worth having an honest conversation with other parents in your circle. You may find more shared concern than you expect, and a collective approach carries more weight with teenagers than one family going it alone.
When should we consider professional support around these conversations?
If conversations about safety consistently escalate into significant conflict, if your teen is engaging in risk-taking behavior across multiple areas, or if your family is processing fear or grief connected to local tragedies, speaking with a therapist who works with adolescents and families can help. Sometimes a neutral third party can open conversations that feel impossible at home.

Saying no to your teenager is one of the hardest parts of parenting. It does not feel good. It creates conflict. They will be angry. And it is still the right call. You are not their peer. You are their parent. Those are different jobs, and the second one matters more.

If you want support navigating these conversations with your teen, or if your family is processing fear or grief connected to what has been happening in our community, our team is here.

Reach out for a free consultation

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Working Hard When No One’s Watching: Lessons Learned From The New York Knicks

What Jalen Brunson's championship mindset can teach students, parents, and anyone building something worth being proud of.


The New York Knicks just won the 2026 NBA Championship, and if you have been following this team at all, you know that Jalen Brunson has been the heartbeat of this entire run. But what struck me most in the aftermath was not a highlight reel moment. It was what Brunson said about where his confidence actually comes from.

"My confidence comes from my work ethic. You put the confidence in everything you do when the lights are on because of everything you've done when no one's watching."
Jalen Brunson, after winning the 2026 NBA Championship (The Growth Equation)

That is not just a great sports quote. It is a framework for how any of us, students especially, can approach performance, preparation, and the pressure that comes with being asked to deliver in front of others.

Working hard when no one is watching is not just a mindset. It is the foundation that makes performing in public feel like the natural next step rather than a leap into the unknown.

The psychology behind working when no one is watching

There is a well-established phenomenon in psychology called social facilitation and social inhibition. Here is the basic idea: when we are watched by others, we tend to perform well-practiced, mastered tasks even better. The presence of an audience elevates arousal, and for things we know deeply, that arousal helps. But for tasks we have not yet mastered, that same arousal makes performance worse.

Think about what that means for students. A student who has genuinely studied and worked through the material before a quiz or exam is not just better prepared on the content: they are also more likely to perform even better under the social pressure of a classroom full of peers. The crowd becomes an advantage, not a threat.

The reverse is equally true. A student who has not put in adequate preparation does not just show up underprepared: the social pressure of the testing environment can actually push their performance further down. The same audience that lifts the prepared student can work against the unprepared one.

When the lights were brightest, Jalen was able to shine because he had already mastered his craft in the quiet moments. The crowd at Madison Square Garden did not create his confidence. It just gave it somewhere to go.

Every child needs a champion

Brunson is the first to point to his father, Rick, as a foundational reason for who he became. Rick Brunson played in the NBA for nine seasons, including a stint with the Knicks in 1999, the last time the team reached the Finals before this year. But what Jalen has talked about repeatedly is not the games or the highlights. It is the hours.

"There'd be days in high school where I thought I played well, my team got the win, and I'd go to the gym still in my uniform, and my dad would say, 'C'mon, let's go. We have more work to do.'"
Jalen Brunson (BrainyQuote)
"I think watching my dad growing up and seeing how hard he worked to be in the position he was, it only pushed me to work harder once I got the opportunity."
Jalen Brunson, Men's Journal, June 14, 2026

Rick was Jalen's champion. Not just a cheerleader, but someone who held him accountable, pushed him when he wanted to stop, and modeled the exact work ethic he was asking his son to build. Every child needs that person. Someone who encourages them when they feel defeated, picks them up when they fall down physically or emotionally, and walks alongside them through the ups and the downs without looking away.

That role does not require athletic expertise or professional credentials. It requires presence, consistency, and the willingness to keep showing up even when your child pushes back. For many kids, that champion is a parent. For others, it might be a coach, a teacher, a therapist, or a mentor. What matters is that the child has someone who genuinely believes in their capacity to grow and is willing to stay in it with them.

The team you build around yourself matters

Brunson has been equally clear about his teammates. The Knicks were given a 31% chance of winning the championship heading into the Finals. They were doubted throughout the postseason. But from inside that locker room, the only opinions that mattered were their own.

"I want to do it with a group of guys you go to the gym with every day, the days you don't want to go to practice, the days you're tired, beat down, but you have your teammates to lift you up."
Jalen Brunson (Sports Illustrated)

For children, the peer group works the same way. Who your child spends time with shapes how they see themselves, what they believe is possible, and whether they are lifted up or pulled down in moments of doubt. As parents and caregivers, one of the most meaningful things we can do is help our children pay attention to how the people around them make them feel: not the social status of those friendships, not the popularity implications, but whether those relationships bring out the best in them.

Help your child ask: does this person encourage me? Do I feel better or worse about myself after spending time with them? Do they push me in a good direction or pull me away from my goals? Those questions matter more than any other metric of a friendship's value.

Three lessons worth taking from the Knicks' championship run

  • 1
    Prepare in private so you can perform in public
    The confidence Brunson showed in the Finals was built in gyms with no audience, in summers with no cameras. For students, consistent study and practice before assessments does not just improve scores: it changes how the pressure of performing in front of others actually feels.
  • 2
    Find your champion and be one for someone else
    Rick Brunson showed up with accountability and belief in equal measure. Every child deserves that presence. If you are a parent, caregiver, or educator, that role may already be yours. Step into it intentionally.
  • 3
    Build your team with intention
    The right people make hard work more sustainable and self-belief more durable. Help the children in your life evaluate their friendships not by social currency but by how those relationships make them feel about themselves and their potential.

Frequently asked questions

What is social facilitation and how does it apply to students?
Social facilitation is the tendency to perform mastered tasks better in the presence of others. For students, this means that thorough preparation before an exam does not just help with content recall: it can actually improve performance under the social pressure of a classroom setting. The reverse, social inhibition, describes how underprepared students may perform even worse in the same environment.
How do I help my child build a stronger work ethic?
The most powerful thing a parent can do is model the behavior they want to see. Children learn work ethic by watching the adults around them. Beyond modeling, consistent encouragement paired with accountability, showing up when things are hard and holding the standard without shaming, builds the internal motivation that eventually drives a child to work hard even when no one is watching.
How do I talk to my child about their friend group without creating conflict?
Focus on feelings rather than judgments. Instead of telling your child a friend is a bad influence, ask how they feel after spending time with that person. Do they feel energized or drained? Confident or insecure? Encouraging that kind of self-reflection builds emotional intelligence and gives your child a framework for evaluating relationships on their own terms rather than reacting to parental criticism.
When should a family consider working with a psychologist around these issues?
If your child is struggling with motivation, academic performance, self-esteem, or peer relationships in ways that are affecting their daily life or causing significant distress, speaking with a licensed psychologist can be a helpful next step. These are not signs of failure: they are signs that your child may benefit from additional support building the skills that underlie long-term success.

The Knicks were given a 31% chance. They did not let anyone else's math define what was possible. That kind of belief does not arrive on its own: it is built, quietly and consistently, in the work that happens when no one is watching.

If you are looking to support your child's motivation, self-belief, or academic performance, our team at Navesink Psychological Services is here to help.

Reach out for a free consultation

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World Cup and the World of Performance Psychology, Opening Days

From overturned yellow cards to a 40-year-old goalkeeper stopping the world's best: the opening days of the 2026 World Cup are a masterclass in mental skills.


The World Cup is now upon us, and there have been great examples of performance psychology skills being displayed in nearly every match so far. Let's walk through a few moments from the opening matches and look at what they can teach you as an athlete, performer, or anyone who has to deliver under pressure.

The best players are not just the most talented. They are the ones who have built the mental skills to handle the moments where talent alone is not enough.

USA 4-1 Paraguay: controlling what you can control

Group D · June 12, 2026 · SoFi Stadium, Los Angeles
USA 4 – 1 Paraguay
Goals: Bobadilla 7' (OG), Balogun 31', Balogun 45+5', Maurício 73', Reyna 90+8'

The 4-1 final score is the headline, but the moments leading up to it are where the sport psychology lessons live. Captain Tim Ream gave us a textbook example of how a true professional handles an uncontrollable. Ream was initially shown a yellow card for an alleged foul on Paraguay captain Miguel Almirón. Ream did not get visibly upset, did not start arguing, and did not try to rally his teammates or coaches to object. He made a brief appeal to the referee and then moved on.

And then something extraordinary happened. VAR intervened under the newly expanded "mistaken identity" rule, and after a lengthy review, the referee reversed his decision: Ream's yellow was rescinded, and Almirón was instead booked for simulation. It was the first time the new rule had been applied at a World Cup, and Ream's calm reaction may have set the conditions for it.

Being up 3-0 probably helped Ream stay regulated, but his behavior demonstrated something we work on constantly in sport psychology: recognizing that what was in his control was his own reaction to the call and nothing else. The referee's decision, VAR, the rule itself: all uncontrollable. His response: completely his.

This match also showed how grit and resilience matter when facing adversity. Paraguay's Maurício scoring in the 73rd minute, while his team was down 3-0, showed pure determination. The Paraguayan side could have easily given up, and they did not. They kept pushing, and the effort paid off with a goal. Resilience is not just for the team that is winning.

Let's also not forget about Gio Reyna's stoppage-time strike to make it 4-1. Did the USA need another goal? Probably not. Did Reyna have something to prove after the 2022 World Cup controversy with his fallout with then-coach Gregg Berhalter? Almost certainly. That is intrinsic motivation in its purest form: not playing for the scoreboard, but playing for yourself and your own story.

Qatar 1-1 Switzerland: never giving up

Group B · June 13, 2026 · Levi's Stadium, Santa Clara
Qatar 1 – 1 Switzerland
Goals: Embolo 13' (pen), Khoukhi 90+4'

Qatar vs. Switzerland was not high on my list of must-watch matches, and I am glad I tuned in anyway. Switzerland controlled the tempo for the entire 90 minutes and registered 26 shots on goal, their most ever in a World Cup match. Breel Embolo had given them the lead from the penalty spot in the 13th minute. By all conventional measures, this game should have been over.

But Qatar refused to accept that script. Captain Boualem Khoukhi headed home an equalizer in the fourth minute of stoppage time, securing Qatar's first-ever World Cup point and only their second goal in World Cup history. The result was historic.

This is what positive attitude, grit, and determination look like together. Qatar did not have the better team on the day. They were outshot, outpossessed, and outplayed. What they had was the mental discipline to stay in the match until the very last moment, and the belief that one chance could change everything.

The Qatari side has to be ecstatic, and they should be. It will be interesting to see how Switzerland bounces back from the late equalizer and whether it impacts their next match. Equally interesting: can Qatar use that late goal to fuel them when they face Canada later this week? In sport psychology, we call this momentum management. A late goal in a draw can feel like a win to one side and a loss to the other, depending entirely on how each team frames it.

Germany 7-1 Curaçao: holding onto hope

Group E · June 14, 2026 · NRG Stadium, Houston
Germany 7 – 1 Curaçao
Goals: Nmecha 6', Comenencia 21', Schlotterbeck 38', Havertz 45+5' (pen), Musiala 47', Brown 68', Undav 78', Havertz 88'

The 7-1 final scoreline does not lie. Germany were dominant. But the moment that mattered most for Curaçao was Livano Comenencia's 21st-minute goal: the first ever World Cup goal in the history of the smallest nation to ever qualify for the tournament. For a brief moment, the score was 1-1 and a Caribbean nation of just over 150,000 people was level with a four-time World Cup winner.

I really hope Curaçao can come back from this loss with their belief intact. Their ability to put one in the back of the net against a much better side gives some hope they can find a result in their next matches. They can use that goal as evidence that even when things look doubtful, anything can happen when you have a plan, commit to it, and believe in the work you have put in.

This is the same principle I wrote about earlier this season with the Knicks: past performance becomes evidence, evidence builds self-efficacy, and self-efficacy fuels belief. Curaçao now has their evidence. The question is what they do with it.

Spain 0-0 Cape Verde: when experience becomes a superpower

Group H · June 15, 2026 · Mercedes-Benz Stadium, Atlanta
Spain 0 – 0 Cape Verde
Cape Verde: 7 saves (Vozinha) · Spain: 27 shots, 70% possession

On paper, Spain vs. Cape Verde looked like it might produce a result similar to Germany vs. Curaçao. A tiny nation making its World Cup debut against a powerhouse. A massive gap in FIFA rankings, resources, and depth. The kind of match you might expect to be over by halftime.

It was not. Not even close.

Cape Verde held Spain, the reigning European champions and one of the favorites to win this entire tournament, to a 0-0 draw. Spain had 27 shots. Seventy percent possession. Lamine Yamal, Mikel Oyarzabal, Ferran Torres. None of it was enough. The difference on the day was not tactical genius or superior athleticism. It was mental: the belief that they belonged on that field, the discipline to execute a defensive plan for 90 grueling minutes, and the grit to hold on when the pressure was most intense.

The clearest embodiment of all of that was in goal. Vozinha, Cape Verde's 40-year-old goalkeeper who plays in the second division of Portuguese football, made seven saves and was in tears at full time. He became the oldest goalkeeper in World Cup history to keep a clean sheet on debut. After the match he said simply: "We are very happy. We knew it wasn't going to be easy. Spain is one of the best national teams in the world. We leave here with a draw, I think we are satisfied with that and now we just have to keep working."

That quote is a clinic in emotional regulation and process focus. Not "we shocked the world." Not "we are the greatest." Just: we knew it would be hard, we did the work, and now we keep working.

There is something worth noting about both Cape Verde and Curaçao: both teams carry experienced, older goalkeepers who have been the backbone of their programs for years. Vozinha has made 90 appearances for Cape Verde. That kind of experience does not just benefit the individual: it anchors a team. Veteran leaders who have been through difficult moments repeatedly bring a steadiness that younger players can feel and draw from. In sport psychology, we talk about how regulated leaders create regulated teams. A goalkeeper who does not panic in front of 70,000 fans while facing the world's best attack sets a tone for everyone behind him.

So why did Cape Verde succeed where Curaçao struggled? The scoresheet is not the only answer. Curaçao still scored their historic goal and showed real quality in moments. But Cape Verde came in with a more defined defensive structure, more tournament experience through AFCON appearances, and a goalkeeper in the peak of his mental maturity even if not his physical prime. The gap between 7-1 and 0-0 against elite opposition is not just talent. It is preparation, structure, belief, and leadership.

"I dreamed of this moment my whole life."
Vozinha, Cape Verde goalkeeper, postgame after Spain 0-0 Cape Verde · June 15, 2026 (World Soccer Talk)

That is the kind of long-term vision and belief that sustains a performer through decades of work at levels far below the spotlight, waiting for one moment to show what they have always known about themselves.

What this means for you

You do not have to be playing in the World Cup for any of this to apply. Whether you are an athlete competing at any level, a performer stepping on stage, or a professional walking into a high-stakes meeting, the same mental skills are at work: controlling what you can control, staying with the present moment, drawing on past evidence of your own resilience, and refusing to give up until the final whistle.

These skills are not innate. They are trained. We work on them with athletes and performers every day at NPS, and they are available to anyone willing to put in the work.

If you are an athlete, a performer, or someone who needs to perform under pressure and you want to build these mental skills, our team is here to help. Sport psychology is not just for elite athletes: it is for anyone whose work involves competition, performance, or high-stakes moments.

Learn about sport psychology at NPS

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Let's Go Knicks! What We Can Learn From Their Historic Run

What the Knicks' historic playoff run can teach athletes, performers, and anyone facing long odds.


As a sport psychologist, it is hard not to root for the Knicks right now. They are the most local team to our practice here in Red Bank (RIP NJ Nets), and what they are doing in this playoff run is genuinely remarkable. They are showing tremendous grit and resilience, never giving up when the odds are stacked against them: down 20 against Boston, down 29 against San Antonio in Game 4 last night, and still finding a way.

Let's break down some of the quotes from this postseason, especially from last night's incredible comeback win over the Spurs, and explore what they can teach you as an athlete, a performer, or anyone who competes under pressure. This applies directly to athletes, but also to actors, dancers, musicians, and performers of all kinds who face high-stakes moments in their work. High-stakes performance is high-stakes performance, regardless of the stage.

The mental skills on display in this Knicks run are not magic. They are trained, practiced, and available to anyone willing to put in the work off the court.

1. Present-moment focus: one possession at a time

As a performer, one of the top strategies is staying in the moment. That is much easier said than done, and it is especially difficult when the present moment is not going your way: like being down 29 points at the half in Game 4 of the NBA Finals. This is not a skill that magically appears when you need it. Like making a three-pointer, it requires practice. We train this skill through awareness of sensations, body scans, mindful breathing, and a number of other grounding strategies that build the capacity to return to right now when the mind wants to spiral.

"Just staying with it, weathering the storm, not being too down or angry or getting mad or frustrated. Just staying with it. Cut it down to 18. Cut it down to 12. Cut it down to six. It's a 48-minute game, so just play until the end."
OG Anunoby, postgame press conference after Game 4 vs. San Antonio Spurs, NBA Finals — June 10, 2026 (ESPN)
"You don't look at when you're down 29, we've got to whip this game. You look at it when you're down 29 of OK, let's get it to 20. There's three minutes left in the third quarter. We're down 18, you're thinking, let's get it to 10."
Josh Hart, postgame after Game 4 vs. San Antonio Spurs, NBA Finals — June 10, 2026 (ESPN)

Both of these quotes describe present-moment focus in action. Neither player was thinking about the 29-point deficit as a whole. They were thinking about the next few points. That incremental, possession-by-possession focus is exactly what we train in sport psychology work: breaking an overwhelming challenge into the smallest actionable unit and staying there.

2. Belief and self-efficacy: controlling what you can control

Staying in the moment is hugely important, but believing in yourself and your team strengthens the ability to stay there. We cultivate feelings of self-efficacy through mantras, positive self-reflection, and building a track record of evidence that even when the score is stacked against you, there is still a chance. This also connects to controlling what you can control. If you believe in yourself, you can believe that your performance is within your influence, even when circumstances are not.

"Believe."
Jalen Brunson, when asked by TNT's Ernie Johnson "How on earth did that just happen?" after Game 4 vs. San Antonio Spurs, NBA Finals — June 10, 2026 (ClutchPoints)
"When you do it once, you know you can do it again. When the Spurs were up 29 and MSG was silent, the Knicks had a library of evidence telling them the game was not over."
OG Anunoby, after Game 4 vs. San Antonio Spurs, NBA Finals — June 10, 2026 (Heavy.com)

That second quote is one of the most clinically useful things I have heard an athlete say in a long time. Past performance, especially past comebacks, becomes evidence. Evidence builds self-efficacy. Self-efficacy fuels belief. And belief makes staying present possible even when everything is telling you to give up.

3. Resilience: weathering the storm

Resilience is about sticking it out when things get tough: not giving up, not quitting, reminding yourself what you have been through to get to this moment. The concept of weathering the storm also connects directly to present-moment awareness. We cannot control that there is a storm. We can control how we move through it. By keeping past adversity top of mind, athletes and performers build a reservoir of resilience they can draw on when things get hard.

"We're a resilient group. We've been through a lot. We've come back plenty of times when we're behind. Just staying with it, weathering the storm, not being too down or angry or frustrated."
OG Anunoby, postgame after Game 4 vs. San Antonio Spurs, NBA Finals — June 10, 2026 (ESPN)
"We've just got a lot of grit, a lot of mental toughness. The thing about us is we don't really look at it as a win streak: we just take it one game at a time. Our biggest game is our next game."
Jalen Brunson, Media Day ahead of Game 2 vs. San Antonio Spurs, NBA Finals — June 2026 (NBA.com)

Notice that Brunson is not dwelling on the streak. He is not savoring it or protecting it. He has reframed it entirely: the biggest game is always the next one. That is resilience applied prospectively, not just in recovery from a setback but as a daily orientation.

4. Process over outcome: focus on what you can do

Process over outcome, sometimes called process over performance, is a key skill in sport psychology. It keeps athletes and performers focused on what they need to do and what they can control, while giving them measurable tasks rather than abstract goals. "Win the game" is not actionable. "Get this stop" is. "Cut it to 20" is. This mindset reduces performance anxiety and keeps attention where it belongs: on execution.

"It was just, Continue to do what got us here. I think in that first half, we didn't do that and we got back to being refocused and having better discipline."
Josh Hart, postgame after Game 4 vs. San Antonio Spurs, NBA Finals — June 10, 2026 (Sports Illustrated)
"We told each other just keep believing. Just keep fighting, sticking together, and keep chipping away. There wasn't going to be a 20-point shot where we can just come back. We've got to keep chipping away possession by possession."
Jalen Brunson, after Game 1 vs. Boston Celtics, Eastern Conference Semifinals — 2026 NBA Playoffs (Sports Illustrated)

"Possession by possession" is process thinking in its purest form. It is the same instruction a musician might give themselves measure by measure, or an actor scene by scene. Break the performance into its smallest controllable unit and execute that unit well.

5. Emotional regulation: don't let the moment take over

Emotional regulation in the face of adversity is central to overall performance and feeds directly into process focus. Staying regulated when it feels like the game is running away from you, and not letting the hype of the moment take over in either direction, creates the conditions for success. This is true when you are down 29 and it is also true when you tip in the game-winner with 1.2 seconds left. Anunoby's postgame comment on that moment is one of the best examples of emotional regulation I have seen from any athlete at any level.

"Just knowing I have to get a stop now. Just staying with it, staying present, not getting too happy cuz the game's not over yet."
OG Anunoby, describing his mindset immediately after tipping in the game-winner with 1.2 seconds remaining, Game 4 vs. San Antonio Spurs, NBA Finals — June 10, 2026 (TalkBasket)
"Our guys showed their resiliency. And showed they're connected enough to handle a moment like that."
Head Coach Mike Brown, postgame after Game 4 vs. San Antonio Spurs, NBA Finals — June 10, 2026 (NBA.com)

Regulation is a team skill as much as an individual one. When the group is connected and trusts one another, individual regulation becomes easier. That is something we work on in team sport psychology settings: building the relational trust that makes collective regulation possible under pressure.

The mental skills on display in this Knicks run are not unique to professional athletes. Present-moment focus, self-efficacy, resilience, process orientation, and emotional regulation are trainable skills available to any athlete, performer, or competitor willing to work on them. If you are an athlete, a performer, or someone navigating high-stakes moments in your own life and want to build these skills, our team is here.

Learn about sport psychology at NPS
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The Power of OK

Two letters. One breath. A completely different outcome.


When working with clients, we often talk about how conflict can arise: whether that is between romantic partners, at work, with children, or just in everyday life. While conflict is not inherently a problem, our reaction often results in less than desirable outcomes. Why is that? Simply put, a reaction is not well thought out. It is a quick, impulsive response and often not in line with our values and beliefs.

One of the best ways to reduce, and even completely avoid, conflict is two simple letters: "OK." When well practiced and aligned with our values, "OK" is a response, not a reaction. That is where our practice what you preach lesson comes into play.

A reaction is quick and impulsive. A response is intentional. "OK" is one of the most powerful responses in the toolkit.

A walk in the park

During a walk this morning I was enjoying the beautiful weather while passing through a local park: one that I have walked through countless times. Over the past few months there has been some construction, and parts of the park had been fenced off. Today the fences were down and the work appeared complete, allowing me to cut through to my neighborhood. As I started down the path, someone jumped out of a pickup truck and began yelling at me that I could not be there, that the police could be called, that people needed to stop walking there, and a whole variety of other unpleasant things.

My initial reaction was to yell back, to point out that he was being rude, that there were no fences or signs, that I was simply taking a walk. But I took a moment to pause and practice what I preach. I simply said: "OK."

This person was demonstrating all the signs of someone who was frustrated, angry, and perhaps looking for a conflict: something I had no interest in engaging with. My goal was to get some exercise and enjoy a beautiful day. As he continued to escalate, I kept my response the same: "OK."

You can't be here. OK
We can call the police. OK
People should know not to walk here. OK

And guess what happened? Nothing. I walked by, avoided the conflict entirely, and enjoyed the rest of my morning. None of that would have been possible without practice.

Why "OK" works

When we react, we give the other person exactly what they are looking for: engagement, escalation, and proof that their frustration has landed. When we respond with "OK," we do the opposite. We acknowledge without agreeing. We disengage without dismissing. We protect our own peace without sacrificing our values.

The therapeutic work we do with clients around conflict, communication, and emotional regulation is exactly this kind of skill-building: learning to pause, reflect, and respond in ways that align with who we want to be. That takes practice. It does not happen automatically, especially when someone is coming at you with heat.

Try it yourself

Next time there is a minor disagreement or potential conflict, take a breath and simply respond: "OK." See what happens. You may be surprised at how quickly the energy shifts when you stop feeding the fire.

Frequently asked questions

Doesn't saying "OK" mean I'm just giving in?
Not at all. "OK" is not agreement: it is acknowledgment. You are not saying the other person is right. You are choosing not to engage in a way that escalates. That is a sign of emotional strength, not weakness.
What if the conflict is serious and needs to be addressed?

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There's (Probably) No Tiger in the Waiting Room

Anxiety · Acceptance & Commitment Therapy

There’s (Probably) No Tiger in the Waiting Room

In treating anxiety, one of the first things we sit with together is an uncomfortable truth: we can never be completely certain that something bad won’t happen. There’s no guarantee to hand out.

But here’s the part that changes everything : we don’t have to be certain, and we don’t have to win an argument with our anxious thoughts before we’re allowed to live. We can notice the thought, make room for the discomfort that comes with it, and still choose to move toward what matters to us.

That’s the heart of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). Anxiety tends to organize our lives around moving away from what feels scary. ACT asks a different question: what would it look like to move toward your values instead : even with the fear riding along?

I often give clients a slightly ridiculous example. It is technically plausible that there’s a tiger in our waiting room right now. Maybe one escaped from a traveling circus, wandered through Red Bank, smelled all the great snacks we keep around, and made its way upstairs. Possible? Sure. Likely? No. So I don’t let that thought take over and stop me from walking through the door. Clients usually laugh, point out how absurd it is, and insist it could never actually happen.

Well. Thanks to the wonderful world of internet algorithms, this landed in my feed: a tiger at a traveling circus leapt into the crowd after a safety barrier collapsed. So apparently I need a new example.

But notice what the story actually shows. The feared thing happened : and no one was hurt. The thought “this could go badly” turned out to be just that: a thought, not a prophecy and not a command. In ACT terms, we’d call this unhooking, or defusion : learning to see a thought as a passing mental event rather than the literal truth we have to obey.

The tiger thought can show up. You can even admit it’s not 100% impossible. And you can still walk into the room.

So don’t let the fear of the tiger stop you. Notice it, let it ride shotgun if it insists, and keep driving toward the life you actually want : the one aligned with your values, where the scary stuff is something you move toward rather than around.

You can do this.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)?
ACT is an evidence-based form of therapy that helps you relate differently to difficult thoughts and feelings rather than fighting to eliminate them. Instead of waiting until anxiety goes away to start living, ACT helps you make room for discomfort while taking action toward the things you value most.
How is ACT different from trying to get rid of anxious thoughts?
Many approaches focus on challenging or removing anxious thoughts. ACT takes a different angle: it treats thoughts as passing mental events rather than facts or commands you must obey. This skill, called defusion or “unhooking,” lets you acknowledge a scary thought without letting it run your decisions.
What does it mean to move toward your values?
Values are the qualities and directions that matter to you : being a present parent, a dependable friend, a curious learner. Anxiety often pulls us to move away from anything uncomfortable. ACT helps you choose actions that move you toward those values, even when fear shows up along the way.
Does ACT work for anxiety?
ACT has strong research support for anxiety, as well as depression, chronic stress, and many other concerns. Rather than measuring success by how little anxiety you feel, it focuses on helping you live a fuller, more values-driven life regardless of what thoughts and feelings come and go.

Ready to take a step toward your values?

Our clinicians at Navesink Psychological Services in Red Bank and Oceanport can help.

Get in touch

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From Correction to Compassion: Supporting Your Child With ADHD

Why the ratio of encouragement to correction matters more than most parents realize — and what to do about it.


Kids with ADHD typically hear a steady stream of correction — a lot more than their peers. Not because they're "worse," but because impulsivity, forgetfulness, and distractibility are more visible. Over time, that constant correction can chip away at motivation and self-esteem in ways that are hard to reverse.

The antidote isn't manufactured praise. It's a genuine, consistent shift in focus: catching kids doing things right, and making sure they hear about it far more often than they hear about what went wrong. If you're unsure whether ADHD is at the root of what you're seeing, a comprehensive evaluation can be a helpful starting point.

Kids with ADHD need to feel seen for what they're doing right far more often than for what they're doing wrong.

One useful guideline is a roughly 10-to-1 ratio of positive feedback to corrections. That number isn't meant to be tracked obsessively — it's a reminder that encouragement needs to significantly outweigh correction, especially for kids who are already getting corrected more than most. If you notice that most of your interactions with your child are corrections, that's the signal to shift, not to count.

A few things to keep in mind about positive reinforcement: it works best when it's genuine. Forced or exaggerated praise is something kids pick up on quickly, and it can backfire. The goal isn't a performance — it's noticeably more encouragement woven into ordinary moments across the day.

6 strategies that actually help

  • 1
    Catch small wins constantly
    Don't wait for big achievements. Noticing and naming small wins builds momentum and helps kids begin to see themselves as capable.
    • "You started your homework without me asking."
    • "I noticed you stayed in your seat for those five minutes."
    • "You remembered your backpack — that's progress."
  • 2
    Make praise specific, not generic
    "Good job" fades quickly. Specific praise sticks because it tells the child exactly what they did and why it mattered.
    • "You kept trying even when that was hard."
    • "I noticed you're really working on staying focused."
  • 3
    Separate the child from the behavior
    This protects your child's identity. Framing corrections around choices — not character — keeps the relationship intact and makes the feedback easier to hear.
    • "That choice didn't work — let's try that again."
    • Instead of: "You're being disruptive."
  • 4
    Keep corrections short and neutral
    Long lectures don't land well with ADHD. A calm tone, few words, and a clear direction is almost always more effective than an extended explanation.
  • 5
    Use pre-correction
    A quick check-in before a challenging situation reduces the need for correction afterward. It primes the child to self-regulate rather than react.
    • "What's the plan when we go into class?"
    • "What's one strategy you can use if you feel the urge to call out?"
    Reduces negative feedback before it's needed
  • 6
    Make positives visible
    Simple tools like "caught being mindful" notes or a visible tally of positive moments make success concrete for kids who may not internalize verbal praise as easily. This isn't a bribe — it's a way of making progress feel real.

Frequently asked questions

Isn't praise just going to make my child expect rewards all the time?
Genuine, specific praise builds intrinsic motivation over time — it's not the same as offering rewards for every behavior. The goal is to help your child notice and feel good about their own progress, not to create a transactional dynamic. The more they internalize a positive self-image, the less external reinforcement they'll need.
What if my child barely has any positive moments to catch?
Start smaller. Look for moments like sitting still for 30 seconds, making eye contact, or walking calmly into a room. For kids who have been in a long cycle of correction, even micro-moments count. The bar needs to meet your child where they actually are — not where you wish they were.
Does this approach work at school too?
Yes, and it can make a significant difference. Teachers who use specific positive feedback and pre-correction strategies typically see fewer behavioral disruptions and better engagement from students with ADHD. Sharing these strategies with your child's teacher — or asking their therapist to connect with the school — can help create consistency across settings.
When should we consider professional support?
If your child's self-esteem, motivation, or behavior at home or school is significantly impacted, a therapist who specializes in ADHD and child development can be a valuable partner. At Navesink Psychological Services, we work with children, families, and schools to build consistent, strengths-based approaches that extend well beyond the therapy room.

Changing a correction-heavy pattern takes time, especially when you're tired and the behaviors are genuinely hard. But small, consistent shifts in how your child hears from you can make a real difference in how they see themselves — and that matters far beyond any single behavior.

If you'd like support building these strategies at home or connecting them to what's happening at school, our team is here to help.

Learn more at Navesink Psychology

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Child Health PANDAS Autoimmune Parenting
May 7, 2026 · 8 min read · Navesink Psychology

When Strep Becomes Something More: A Parent's Guide to PANDAS

Your child had strep throat — and then something changed. Here's what every parent needs to know about PANDAS.

HA
Hadeel Alabed
Psychology Doctoral Student Intern · Navesink Psychology
Important note

If your child has experienced a sudden, dramatic change in behavior or mood after a strep infection, speak with a specialist. Early identification leads to better outcomes.

What exactly is PANDAS?

Think of the immune system as a search-and-destroy team sent to fight strep bacteria. In children with PANDAS — Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorder Associated with Streptococcal infections — that team makes a critical mistake: it accidentally attacks healthy brain tissue instead of just the bacteria.

This "friendly fire" causes the brain to become inflamed, triggering a sudden and severe onset of OCD, tics, or restrictive eating in children before puberty. It is not a behavioral problem. It is not bad parenting. It is a medical condition with biological roots.

1 in 200
children in the US have PANDAS (PANDAS Network)
Pre-puberty
typical age of onset
Group A Strep
the bacterial trigger

How can a sore throat change my child's personality?

When Group A strep bacteria enter the body, the immune system produces antibodies to fight them. In children with PANDAS, those antibodies cross-react with proteins in the brain — specifically in areas that regulate mood, movement, and behavior, like the basal ganglia.

The result: abnormal brain signaling that can look like OCD, intense anxiety, sudden mood shifts, tics, or rage. It is a cyclic pattern — symptoms flare during or after infections, then may calm, then return with the next exposure.

Common symptoms to watch for:

Sleep disturbances
Sudden OCD or anxiety
Handwriting decline
Personality changes
Tics or motor issues
Academic regression
Bedwetting (regression)
Sensory sensitivity

Did this happen "overnight"?

Often, yes — and that overnight change is one of PANDAS's most distinctive hallmarks. Parents frequently describe it as a "light switch": their child went to bed one person and woke up someone different.

That said, the initial symptoms may not appear until months after a strep infection in some children. If your child is showing signs now but had strep earlier this year, PANDAS is still worth exploring.

The "light switch" check

Keep a simple log: when did symptoms start, how suddenly, and was there any illness in the weeks before? This timeline is one of the most important pieces of evidence when speaking with a specialist.

Is this permanent?

This is the fear that keeps parents up at night — and the answer, reassuringly, is no. PANDAS is treatable. Your child is still in there. The behaviors and symptoms are a sign of a brain under physiological stress, not a permanent personality change.

With appropriate treatment — especially when caught early — many children see significant improvement and return to their baseline selves. The earlier you identify and treat it, the better the outcomes tend to be.

Is it "bad behavior" or a "medical flare"?

This is one of the most important questions a parent can ask. A child in a PANDAS flare is not being defiant — their brain is physically inflamed and sending distorted signals. Trying to discipline your way through a medical episode will not work, and it is not your child's fault.

Ask yourself: did this behavior come on suddenly, does it seem disconnected from anything that happened at school or home, and does it cycle — getting better and then worse again? Those patterns point toward something physiological, not behavioral.

Why didn't my pediatrician catch this?

PANDAS is not yet part of standard medical school curriculum, and many pediatricians simply have not been trained to recognize it. This is not a failure of your doctor — it is a gap in systemic awareness that the PANDAS community is actively working to close.

You may need to advocate strongly. Ask for a referral to a specialist familiar with PANDAS, or contact the PANDAS Network (pandasnetwork.org) for physician resources. Diagnosis typically involves:

Strep cultures
Immunological tests
Brain scans
Cunningham Panel
Medical history review
Allergy testing

How do we fix it?

Treatment addresses both the infection and the brain inflammation. Antibiotics to treat or prevent strep are often a first step. Anti-inflammatory medications, immunotherapy (like IVIG or plasmapheresis), and behavioral therapy — including ERP for OCD symptoms — are all part of the toolkit depending on severity.

Therapy alone is rarely enough during a flare. But therapy becomes very powerful once the biological component is being treated. Think of it this way: you wouldn't ask someone with a broken leg to just try harder to walk. You treat the break, then do the rehab.

5 practical tools for parents

1
Do the "light switch" check
Track how fast symptoms appeared and whether a strep infection or illness preceded them. A sudden onset after illness is a key diagnostic signal — write it down with dates.
2
Regulate yourself first
During a flare, your child's nervous system is already overwhelmed. A calm, low-stimulation response from you helps de-escalate — even when the behavior is alarming or confusing.
3
Separate the child from the symptoms
Remind yourself and your child: "This is the PANDAS talking, not you." It protects your relationship and reduces shame and confusion for your child during hard moments.
4
Create predictable structure
Routine provides neurological safety for children whose brains are under stress. Consistent schedules, low-stimulation environments, and predictable transitions reduce flare intensity.
5
Build your care team early
Assemble a team that includes a PANDAS-literate physician, a therapist familiar with OCD and childhood autoimmune conditions, and your school's support staff. No one should navigate this alone.

Frequently asked questions

Is PANDAS the same as OCD?
Not exactly. OCD is the symptom; PANDAS is the underlying cause in these cases. A child with PANDAS may look like they have OCD, but the root is an autoimmune response — which means treatment needs to address the immune system, not just the behavior.
Will my child have PANDAS forever?
Many children with PANDAS improve significantly — especially with early treatment. Some children fully recover. Symptoms often diminish as children age through puberty, though ongoing strep prevention may remain important.
What should I do if my child just had strep?
Complete the full course of antibiotics. Monitor closely for any sudden behavioral or emotional changes in the days and weeks after. If you notice anything sudden and out-of-character, document it and contact your physician promptly.
How is PANDAS different from normal anxiety or OCD?
The key distinction is the sudden, dramatic onset tied to infection. Standard OCD typically develops gradually. PANDAS symptoms appear like a switch was flipped — often within 24–48 hours of illness — and they may cycle with future infections.

If you're navigating PANDAS or suspect your child may be affected, we're here to help.

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Anxiety Tips: Using AI To Stay Informed Without Spiraling

Using AI to Stay Informed Without Spiraling | Navesink Psychological Services

Using AI to Stay Informed Without Spiraling

When world events feel overwhelming, the answer isn't avoidance — or a research rabbit hole. There's a better way.


When something scary is happening in the world — a disease outbreak, a natural disaster, a geopolitical crisis — many of us feel the pull to do one of two things: shut it all out, or consume every piece of information we can find. Both of these instincts make complete sense. And both of them tend to make anxiety worse.

Why Avoidance Backfires

When we avoid something that makes us anxious, we get a small dose of short-term relief. The problem is that we never fully relax — we're just waiting for the anxiety to come back. And it always does. This is the anxiety cycle: feel anxious → try to ignore → feel temporary relief → encounter a reminder → feel anxious again.

World events are particularly difficult to avoid, because they show up everywhere. Imagine trying to tune out a news story by watching a sporting event. Then the announcer mentions it. A player is wearing a warmup shirt. A fan holds up a sign. Suddenly you're right back where you started — and now your avoidance strategy has failed, which can feel even more distressing.

Time Anxiety Level Avoidance cycle Staying informed Never fully resolves Returns to baseline Anxiety Over Time: Avoidance vs. Staying Informed

Avoidance provides temporary relief but keeps anxiety cycling. Processing accurate information allows anxiety to naturally resolve.

The Other Extreme: The Research Rabbit Hole

The opposite instinct — consuming every piece of information available — isn't the answer either. Most online content about scary world events is opinion-heavy, sensationalized, or simply incomplete. The more we read, the more questions we find, and the more uncertain we feel. It becomes an endless quest to find the piece of information that will finally make us feel safe. That piece doesn't exist.

Finding the Middle Ground — With AI

What we want is a happy middle ground: enough accurate information to feel grounded, without diving so deep that we destabilize. This is where tools like AI can be genuinely helpful — and they have a real advantage over a traditional internet search.

A Google search returns dozens of links: headlines designed to provoke clicks, opinion pieces, conflicting reports, comment sections. AI, when prompted thoughtfully, returns a synthesized, calm summary. You control exactly what you get.

The Strategy

Tell the AI you're anxious before you ask your question. Ask for a few facts to stay informed. Ask it to end on a positive note. Then stop — don't open links, don't search for more.

Try This Exact Prompt

Here's a real example. Copy and paste this into any AI tool:

Example Prompt
"I have significant anxiety and I am worried about the cruise ship hantavirus. Provide me a few facts about the situation so I can be informed without getting overly anxious. End on a positive note."

The response you'll get should be limited, fact-based, and give you just enough to feel oriented — without opening a door to spiraling. That's the goal.

A Word of Caution

Monitor your use of this strategy. If you find yourself asking AI for information repeatedly throughout the day — checking and re-checking — that pattern is itself a form of the anxiety cycle. Like any coping tool, this works best when used intentionally and sparingly. If it's becoming compulsive, that's worth talking through with a therapist.

Frequently Asked Questions

What if the AI gives me information that makes me more anxious?
That can happen, especially if the topic is genuinely serious. The key is to prompt carefully — specify that you want calm, factual information and a positive close. If you read the response and feel significantly worse, that's a signal to pause AI use for this topic and speak with a mental health professional instead.
Is this the same as exposure therapy?
It borrows from the same principles. Exposure therapy works by gradually confronting feared stimuli so the anxiety response naturally reduces over time. Getting accurate, contained information about a scary event is a mild, manageable form of that — you're engaging with the thing rather than avoiding it, but in a controlled way.
What if I have anxiety about things beyond just world events?
This strategy is specifically suited to informational anxiety — the kind driven by uncertainty about external events. For anxiety rooted in personal, social, or health-related concerns, or for anxiety that significantly impacts daily functioning, working with a therapist is the most effective path. Our team at Navesink Psychological Services specializes in anxiety treatment — reach out anytime.
How many times should I use this strategy in a day?
Once per topic, ideally. The goal is to get enough information to feel oriented and then redirect your attention. If you feel the urge to check again an hour later, try to notice that urge without acting on it — that pause is itself a therapeutic skill.
Anxiety Coping Strategies AI Tools News Anxiety Avoidance Mindfulness Mental Health NJ Navesink Psychology World Events Psychoeducation

Struggling with anxiety about world events?

Our team at Navesink Psychological Services works with individuals navigating anxiety in all its forms — from everyday worry to more persistent patterns. We'd love to help.

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Tips for Managing Catastrophizing

Practical strategies from a psychologist on recognizing and moving through catastrophic thinking.


I was recently interviewed for an article in Parade Magazine on the traits of people who often catastrophize. It's a topic that comes up constantly in my work with clients, and I wanted to expand on some practical strategies here for anyone looking to get a better handle on their own catastrophic thinking.

Catastrophizing is not a character flaw. It is a natural feature of how our brains are wired — and with the right tools, it's something you can learn to work with rather than against.
  • 1
    Start with awareness
    Ask yourself: "How big do I think this problem is compared to how a close friend or loved one would rate it?" You can even take it a step further and actually ask that friend to weigh in. If your rating is significantly higher than theirs, that's a signal you may be catastrophizing. The gap between how we perceive a problem and how others see it is often one of the clearest early indicators.
  • 2
    Don't add shame to the pile
    When you catch yourself catastrophizing, resist the urge to criticize yourself for it. This kind of thinking is a natural part of our survival system — it's hardwired into our brains and has served an important purpose throughout human history. Accepting that catastrophizing is something most people experience, and that it can even be helpful at times, keeps you from adding more fuel to an already burning fire.
  • 3
    Play it out
    Ask yourself: if what I'm afraid of actually happened, what would I do? How would I manage it? Draw on past experiences where you've navigated difficult situations and found your way through. Catastrophizing often creates tunnel vision — we see only the problem and nothing else. The solutions are usually there. We just need to shift our focus enough to find them.
  • 4
    Take action
    Think about what you can do right now. Sometimes that means giving yourself permission to step away from the problem — deciding that further thought isn't helpful in this moment and scheduling a specific time to return to it. Getting outside, moving your body (a quick walk, a short workout), or simply changing your environment can open up new ways of thinking. Bringing your full attention to one task — how does the walk feel, how many push-ups can I do — shifts focus and creates space for a clearer headspace.
  • 5
    Don't hesitate to ask for help
    Too often, people end up catastrophizing about the fact that they're catastrophizing, and then feel ashamed or embarrassed to bring it up. Reach out to a trusted friend or a mental health professional and let them help you examine your thought patterns. And who knows — with some practice, you might become the friend someone else turns to when they need that same steady perspective.

Frequently asked questions

Is catastrophizing a mental health disorder?
Not on its own. Catastrophizing is a cognitive pattern — a way of thinking — that most people engage in to some degree. It becomes a concern when it's frequent, intense, and significantly interferes with daily life or decision-making. It often shows up alongside anxiety and depression, and is something that responds well to therapy.
Can therapy really help with catastrophizing?
Yes. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) in particular is very effective for identifying and shifting catastrophic thought patterns. At Navesink Psychological Services, our clinicians use evidence-based approaches to help clients develop more balanced, realistic thinking.
How do I know if I catastrophize more than average?
The friend check-in described in Tip 1 is a great starting point. If you consistently find that others rate your problems as much smaller than you do, or that you frequently imagine worst-case outcomes that don't materialize, it may be worth exploring with a professional.
What's the difference between catastrophizing and being cautious?
Healthy caution is proportional and action-oriented — it helps you prepare for realistic risks. Catastrophizing tends to be disproportionate, difficult to control, and often leads to paralysis rather than preparation. The key distinction is whether the thinking is helping you take useful action or keeping you stuck.

Catastrophizing is one of the most common thinking patterns I encounter in my practice, and one of the most treatable. With awareness, self-compassion, and the right strategies, it's entirely possible to change your relationship with worst-case thinking — and to feel more grounded and capable when life gets hard.

If you'd like support working through anxiety or unhelpful thought patterns, our team at Navesink Psychological Services is here to help.

Reach out at Navesink Psychology

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The Therapy to Home Connection

Why the space between sessions matters just as much as the sessions themselves.


The core problem

If you're a parent or caregiver of a child in therapy, you might notice that progress can feel slow at times, or that certain behaviors continue even though your child is working hard in sessions. This is a common experience, and it can be confusing.

A child may spend an hour a week in therapy — but they spend most of their time at home, making the home environment one of the biggest influences on their progress. Real, lasting change tends to happen when what's being worked on in therapy is also supported in daily life.

For example, a child might be learning how to recognize and manage anxiety. But if a caregiver responds to that anxiety with heightened energy or strong emotional reactions, it can be harder for the child to use those new skills consistently. When there's a disconnect between therapy and home, it can create confusion or reinforce old patterns.

Without some shifts in the broader environment, children can end up going in circles — trying different tools without enough consistency to see what really helps, and what doesn't.

A holistic approach

Therapy gives children tools, language, and insight. It offers a space to explore emotions and practice new ways of coping. But it's only one part of the process.

A more holistic approach to child mental health means recognizing that children are deeply influenced by their relationships and environment. When caregivers are involved, curious, and open to adjusting their responses, therapy tends to be more effective and longer lasting.

This doesn't mean being perfect. It means being open to learning, reflecting, and growing alongside your child. When children see the adults in their lives doing this too, it builds safety, trust, and supports real change.

5 practical tools for caregivers

  • 1
    Regulate yourself first
    Children often take emotional cues from adults. Before responding to your child's distress, take a moment to check in with yourself. A calmer response can help de-escalate situations more than reacting with urgency or intensity.
  • 2
    Mirror the language used in therapy
    If your child is learning specific coping skills or emotional language, try to use those same terms at home. Consistency makes it easier for your child to apply what they've practiced in sessions.
  • 3
    Validate before redirecting
    Instead of jumping straight to solutions, acknowledge your child's feelings first — "I can see you're really anxious right now." Feeling understood can help lower emotional intensity and make problem-solving easier.
  • 4
    Create predictable routines
    Structure and consistency at home can provide a sense of safety, especially for children dealing with anxiety, emotional regulation challenges, or trauma.
  • 5
    Stay curious, not critical
    If something isn't working, try to approach it with curiosity rather than frustration or judgment. Ask yourself: "What might my child need right now?" or "What's underneath this behavior?"

Frequently asked questions

Why isn't therapy alone enough?
Because children spend most of their time outside the therapy room. Without support in everyday moments, new skills can be hard to implement — let alone maintain. The home environment is where habits and patterns are reinforced or shifted.
Do I need to change my parenting style completely?
Not at all. Small, intentional shifts in how you respond can make a meaningful difference over time. The goal isn't to overhaul everything — it's to become a little more attuned and consistent.
What if I make mistakes?
You will, and that's part of the process. Repairing and modeling growth can be really powerful for children. It shows them that relationships can survive difficult moments — and that's a lesson that lasts.
How involved should I be in my child's therapy?
This depends on the therapist's approach and your child's needs. Staying informed, asking questions, and remaining open to collaboration is usually very helpful. Your child's therapist at Navesink Psychology can guide you on what involvement looks like for your specific situation.

Supporting a child in therapy isn't just about getting them to appointments — it's about shaping an environment where what they're learning can actually carry over into everyday life. When caregivers are willing to reflect and make small adjustments, therapy becomes something that extends well beyond the session.

You don't need to have all the answers. Being present, open, and willing to grow alongside your child already makes a meaningful difference.

Learn more at Navesink Psychology

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The Rising Cost of Behavioral Health

Behavioral health conditions require consistent and focused care, and when looking at medical expenditure, the cost of quality care is evident. A recent study in JAMA Pediatrics quantified behavioral healthcare costs in 2011 and 2022, examining its effects on family financial burden. Researchers found that behavioral healthcare services have nearly doubled in the last decade, now accounting for 40% of pediatric healthcare spending. This spike in spending reflects an increased need for pediatric behavioral care. In recent years, stigma has reduced, encouraging more awareness and diagnosis. Additionally, COVID-19 may have exacerbated the need due to social isolation, school closures, uncertainty, grief, and financial stressor related triggers.  

While overall spending has increased, families are also covering more of the financial burden. Out-of-pocket costs for pediatric behavioral health care rose from $2.1 billion to $2.9 billion over the same period, increasing faster than other types of medical expenses. Families with child(ren) who need behavioral health services are more likely to experience financial strain, with some families spending more than 10% of their income on health care. 

The results of this study highlights a detrimental gap between the demand for behavioral care and its accessibility. With in-network providers disappearing, many families are unable to afford necessary behavioral care for their children. Financial strain can cause families to delay or forgo care, often leading to reliance on acute care and increased long-term costs. Additionally, high out-of-pocket spending is associated with reductions in care and poor overall health outcomes. As demand continues to grow, expanding access to behavioral health professionals and strengthening insurance coverage will be key to reducing both the financial burden on families and barriers to care for children.

At Navesink Psychological Services, we focus on one simple idea: “People Over Profits.” We want to offer the highest level of evidence-based care to as many individuals and families as possible. Although we are an out-of-network provider, every clinician and evaluator offers sliding scale appointments and pro bono services to meet the needs of our community. Since our first day in business, we have never turned someone away because they could not afford an out-of-network service; instead, we work with them to figure out how to get them the care they need and deserve.

Foster, A., Cushing, A., Hoffman, J., Nash, K., Lee, C., & Michelson, K. (2026). Expenditures for pediatric behavioral health care over time and estimated family financial burden. Jama Pediatrics, 180(2), 194-201. doi:10.1001/jamapediatrics.2025.5181

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Building a Winning Home: How to Create a Family Culture of Accountability and Love

As a licensed psychologist who works with whole family systems, Dr. Tom Gambino has found that families often struggle to establish rules and boundaries at home. Parents report that loving and supporting a child while also holding them accountable can be a difficult balance to strike. But by borrowing from the world of sport psychology, families can take a page from a championship playbook. Winning teams consistently describe how a strong team culture carries them through adversity, keeps them united, and holds every member accountable — regardless of their role.

One strategy for building that same warm, "winning" culture at home is the weekly family meeting. During these meetings, every family member shares their thoughts on what the rules, expectations, and norms at home should look like. Children are encouraged to offer their own ideas, while parents share what matters most to them. Together, the family agrees on 5 to 7 rules, which are written on poster board, signed by every member, and displayed in multiple places around the house. From that point on, everyone is responsible for holding each other accountable, and any concerns are saved for the next weekly meeting. Over time, parents can introduce incentives to reinforce the rules, and the list itself can only be changed with the full agreement of the entire family. This work can also be completed in a family therapy session with the help of the licensed professionals at Navesink Psychological Services.


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Cannabis Use and Mental Health

Cannabis and Mental Health

​​Clients and their families often ask about cannabis use to treat mental health concerns when working with our providers at Navesink Psychological Services in Red Bank, NJ. George Halliwell, LPC often works with clients looking to reduce cannabis use.

Kansagara, Terry, Ayers, et al. recently published Cannabis and Mental Health A Review describing the current research on cannabis use for mental health conditions as well as the effects of cannabis use. While clients will often report anecdotal evidence that cannabis use improves their mental health conditions, studies have not shown positive effects. Currently, there is no mental health condition for which cannabis is currently supported as a treatment, yet there are substantial documented harms. 

Mental Health Diagnoses

For PTSD, Kansagara describe two clinical trials, the largest of which found no difference in PTSD symptom severity between cannabis and placebo. Of note, the sample was 80 veterans so overall the study was small and with a select group of individuals. One small study found nabilone (synthetic THC) reduced nightmares but not sleep quality overall. Evidence is low-certainty and insufficient to recommend cannabis for PTSD. 

For Anxiety, THC has unpredictable effects: a low dose (7.5 mg) reduced anxiety in some people, while a higher dose (12.5 mg) induced it. CBD at 150–300 mg/day shows some early promise for generalized and social anxiety disorder, but evidence is still low-certainty and more trials are needed.

For Depression, almost no clinical trials exist. Cannabis does not appear to improve depression, and heavier use is associated with increased suicidality and self-harm. 

For Bipolar Disorder, seven observational studies consistently show cannabis worsens mania, reduces recovery, and leads to worse social and employment outcomes. Patients with bipolar disorder should be clearly advised against cannabis use, especially high-THC products.

The area of clearest and most alarming risk is Psychosis. Up to 50% of people who experience cannabis-induced psychosis go on to develop schizophrenia or other chronic psychotic disorders. One 2024 longitudinal study found an 11-fold increased risk of psychotic disorders associated with adolescent cannabis use. Daily use (vs. no use) roughly doubles the risk of psychosis. People with a family history of psychotic disorders are at even greater risk.

Cannabis is frequently self-used for ADHD, but the one small clinical trial found no benefit on attention, memory, or cognition. Acute intoxication actually mimics ADHD symptoms.

About 30% of people who used cannabis in the past year meet criteria for Cannabis Use Disorder (CUD). There are no FDA-approved medications to treat it. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), motivational enhancement therapy, and contingency management have some evidence. At Navesink Psychological Services, our team has expertise in CBT, motivational interviewing, and behavioral management, strategies that help clients reduce cannabis use and empower them to make different choices.

In a more general sense, cannabis use impacts Cognition. THC acutely impairs memory, executive function, and processing speed. Adolescents who use regularly may experience lasting IQ declines. In adults, cognitive effects likely improve with sustained abstinence, but the timelines are unclear.

High Risk Groups

While we know that cannabis use does not currently show evidence to treat mental health concerns, it is especially important to consider high risk groups that should be strongly discouraged from cannabis use. These groups include:

  • Adolescents and young adults (developing brains)

  • People with bipolar disorder

  • People with psychotic or psychosis-risk conditions (including those with a first-degree relative with psychosis)

  • Pregnant individuals (moderate-certainty evidence of preterm birth and low birth weight)

  • Those with a history of substance use disorder

Summary of Mental Health Effects of Cannabis and Cannabinoids

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School Closures and Stress

With the recent announcement of school closures in Middletown, NJ a lot of children and families are facing the stressful situation of uncertainty. Our team remains committed to helping anyone facing stress, anxiety, depression, and other feelings related to the challenges in our local community.

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Opportunity For Connection

Being a mental health practice leader includes understanding what others need beyond the basic levels of a comfy chair and a well-stocked snack cabinet. Isolation can lead to burnout and a reduction in quality of care for clients, issues that can be corrected through connection. To support connection, we host events for not only our staff but the mental health community at large, because when we all feel better, we all do better, which helps as many clients as possible.

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More Snow?!?! An Opportunity for Acceptance

Well, it looks like we are in for another snowstorm Sunday night, with totals reaching multiple inches in the Red Bank area, and chances of snow are high for all of New Jersey.

As I checked the weather, my initial thoughts were “Oh no, not again! We were just starting to see the green signs of spring as the snow from our last storm melted off. This is going to mess up the Monday morning commute and delay schools. I wish it wouldn’t snow again!”

Then it hit me! What a great time to practice some acceptance using skills taught in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). While I can not control the storm, I can control my thoughts and feelings about it and make space for the uncomfortable. I can see the joy in changing weather patterns and the excitement of school-aged children, hopeful for a snow day. I can set an intention to get some more exercise shoveling and helping neighbors dig out their cars. If work is cancelled, I can spend the time connecting with my family and friends and live the values that are most important to me.

So, whether we get a light dusting or a full-on blizzard, I am mentally prepared to accept the outcome and find peace in not fighting what I can not control.

Enjoy the rest of winter!

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Technology Time Outs For Connection

Parents and families are often looking for guidance about technology use, and I have been working to find the research to help navigate these waters. 

Parental Technology Use in a Child’s Presence and Health Development in the Early Years, a systematic review and meta-analysis published in JAMA Pediatrics, examined how parents’ use of technology around young children affects early development. The study found that technoference (the frequent parental use of technology) was associated with negative psychosocial and cognitive outcomes. 

The findings do not suggest that technology use is inherently harmful or that parents should avoid using their devices completely. They demonstrate that we should be mindful about how and when technology is used around children. This is especially important during routine moments and daily interactions that could lead to communication, connection, and learning, if there is not a screen standing in the way. Early childhood requires responsiveness and reciprocal actions. If parents engage in frequent technology use around their children, connection decreases. Our team at Navesink Psychological Services suggests scheduled Tech Time Outs where everyone puts away devices and focuses on meaningful connections. For example, we saw many families enjoying time outside in Red Bank watching the ice boats on the Navesink River. Find the moments to put tech away and reconnect with what matters.

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Social Media For Teens, The Goldilocks Theory of Too Little, Just Right, and Too Much

We often have families ask about social media use, and until recently, there has not been a lot of great research. As we help families in the Red Bank area navigate concerns with social media we are always looking for resources to share.

A recent article published in JAMA, Social Media Use and Well-Being Across Adolescent Development, compared the amount of time teens spend on social media to their well-being. In short, "moderate after-school social media use was linked to the highest well-being outcome," while teens that did not use social media at all "were more likely to experience decreased well-being in later adolescence."

The goal is to find the right amount or just enough time on social media for all teens. In my experience, families that are proactive and involve their teens in the social media decision-making process often have the best outcomes. Proactive work involves educating teens on being safe on social media, setting clear guidelines and limits for how long/when social media is allowed, and transparency that parents will have access or be able to see what their child is posting on social media. As teens become older, parents can become more lenient and flexible. 

An analogy that comes to mind is a teen learning how to drive a car. Even though there are inherent risks to driving, we wouldn't want to prevent them from driving a car or give them keys to a car the minute they turn 16. The general course of action for teens learning how to drive is taking a driving class, practicing driving with a driving instructor, driving with an adult in the car, then a probationary license with restrictions, with the goal being to receive their full license a few years later. Having these graduated steps in driving is a good framework for teens as they learn about social media and how to use it. 

Guest feature by Dr. Gambino, https://gambinopsych.com/

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